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2022: the year of a 180° surprise turn in Life

2022… what. a. Fucking. Year! If there is one lesson I relearned hard, it’s this:

Actions speaks louder than words.

And it hurts. It hurts like Hell when you are at the receiving end of hurtful actions, when you have a hard time processing what is happening in the moment, and have to retreat for your emotional and mental safety. Sometimes, retreating to your safe space is the best thing to do for yourself, to regain comprehension over a situation, and decide what to do next.

I am very lucky to be well surrounded, and in a good mental state, to have managed to pass through it, even if I have lost in the process someone I thought was going to stay throughout my life for a damn fucking while. 2022 may end as vastly different as how I started it, but at least I end it proud at myself for standing up for my values and truth.

Quite happy to start 2023 in a peaceful mindset, ready to tackle new challenges. Just…no more emotional ones, ok, Life? Please? 😝
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Ces derniers 10 ans…

Mon dieu que les 10 dernieres annĂ©es furent….WOW

La trentaine; le mariage; la maternitĂ©; la parentalitĂ©; les 10 projets commencĂ©s, et les 9 mourrus au travers de la dĂ©cennie; la famille; les Repos du Guerrier; la carriĂšre qui avance Ă  petits pas; le syndrĂŽme de l’imposteur; les cycles dĂ©pressifs; les crises d’anxiĂ©tĂ©; les envies de mourrir; les envies de vivre; les up and down Ă©motionnelles; les diagnostics; les traumatismes; les peurs; les insĂ©curitĂ©s; les abandons; les traitements; la thĂ©rapie qui sauve la vie; les Macaques, toujours lĂ ; un amour qui te trahit; les meilleurs amis qui partent; le divorce amicale; la coparentalitĂ© de groupe; les enfants des autres; la redĂ©couverte de soi; les ambitions rĂ©alistes qui reviennent; la petite famille de chats; les amitiĂ©s surprises; les hobbies qui changent; la tech; l’infosec qui me passionne Ă  nouveau; la Nano qui grandit et m’Ă©merveille malgrĂ© ses crises et anxiĂ©tĂ©s propre Ă  elle…

J’en oublie, mais en mĂȘme temps, c’est en mĂ©moire dans ma tĂȘte: je constate que la Debbie de 2010 n’est dĂ©finitivement plus la mĂȘme que celle qui s’apprĂȘte Ă  franchir 2020 et #bientotLaQuarantaine avec sĂ©rĂ©nitĂ©, confiance en elle-mĂȘme, et bien entourĂ©e, tant de ses prĂ©cieux vieux sages Macaques que de ses nouveaux Macaques.

2019 aura Ă©tĂ© une annĂ©e oĂč j’aurai ENFIN “jeter” pas mal tous les “dĂ©chets” qu’ils restaient et m’empĂȘchaient d’avancer dans la vie. Cet annĂ©e finit en force, car de nouveaux commencement me sont arrivĂ©s depuis juin, et franchement, il Ă©tait temps!

À 2020 et la quarantaine: la Pirate est parĂ©e Ă  ton abordage, prĂȘte Ă  aller cueillir les trĂ©sors que tu lui caches 😉

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Les dimanches anxieux

Les dimanches aprÚs-midi sont les pires moments de ma semaine. Encore pire quand ma fille est chez son pÚre.

C'est LE moment dans ma semaine oĂč une crise d'anxiĂ©tĂ© a le plus de chance de dĂ©buter, m'entrainant dans un flot incessant de pensĂ©es anxieuses qui n'ont habituellement

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Share of the day: A Working Class Death

??
“You know the careful visual distinctions we make in this country. “Dress like the job you want” also means “if you can’t dress and groom that way, good luck getting that job.” You’re your father’s daughter, so you grok the penalty of dressing the wrong way, but you’re also uneasy with passing as upper class no matter what your education and salary. The working class made you and at some fundamental level you’re loyal to it. The reflexive mockery of the people you come from by the people around you bites every time. And when Hannibal Lecter says to Clarice Starling, “You’re just one generation removed from poor white trash”—oh, you feel that. You know the gaze the monster turns on her. You’ve spent years avoiding it.”

http://true.proximitymagazine.org/2018/10/11/a-working-class-death/

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National Coming Out Day

Some of you might not know it but…Yup, I’m on the Queer Side of Life, you all! Always knew I wasn’t a straight woman, but didn’t found my “label” until 2-3 years ago (I’m a genderfluid Pansexual). I am lucky to live in a place where I CAN come out without repercussions on my life. And I am lucky to be surrounded by an amazing tribe that accept me (and others) as we are: authentic, queer and happy. So, to my friends and allies, thank you for being there, too! But for those who can’t come out: we are there for you, if/when you come out. ❀ and all. We will continue to fight for equality of all human beings on this planet.

via my Instagram http://bit.ly/2EcPEu5
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Hello! Je m’appelle Debbie, et je souffre de problĂšmes de santĂ© mentale [Semaine Nationale de la santĂ© mentale]

Avant de commencer, j'aimerais aviser les gens que je vais parler de sujets lourds et traumatisants, incluant l'automutilation et le suicide. J'avise aussi les lecteurs que je parle de mon expérience personelle: si vous connaissez une personne qui pourrait vivre avec des troubles

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